Expecting Perfection

I don’t like the way he brushes his teeth. He frequently walks to another room while he’s talking and I can no longer hear him. He doesn’t wash his hands as thoroughly as I think he should. (There’s no way he can sing the Happy Birthday song that fast.) I’m sure there are probably a […]

A Trusted Friend


My husband and I recently join some old friends for dinner and a ballet performance at a local university. Since we moved further away from them several years ago, we don’t see them often. She was a significant confidant and advisor to me for many years. This evening is a special treat.

Seeing her […]

Stay on My Side of the Street


There is a catchphrase that I heard years ago that has been generously helpful in maintaining harmony in our home over the last few decades. I hear these wise words speaking to me inside my head whenever I am tempted to focus on my spouse’s words, behavior, or motives. Stay on my side of […]

Avoiding Escalation

I must confess that In our earlier less mature years my spouse and I got into some acutely hurtful and emotional arguments. As we let the arguments escalate, our words became increasingly more hateful and destructive. I usually ended up in tears, screaming at him, trying to convince him of my point of view. Somehow, […]